At times, we feel the need to please everyone but the truth is: YOU CAN NEVER PLEASE EVERYONE!!!. You can be so busy trying to please others that you lose yourself in the process !! Let's be real for a moment: we want people to like us & I'll be the first to admit that. However, the danger of that is allowing people to rule your life when they don't even care about you.Why try so hard to please others when they don't put any effort to show that they care about you? And if they do say they care about you, why feel the need to use all of your energy to impress them? Reminder: You have to be okay with people not liking you & although you may feel like they don't, you still have to be okay with that. There is no need to get out of your way to please others while you're the one who is getting hurt!!! Take your emotions to God & let him deal with you. If you don't, you may try to show them the same attitude they have had towards you & before you know it, your letting your emotions rule you! This is serious because you're now responding based on he hurt you feel inside !!! I honestly can't emphasize this enough: Take all your issues to Christ, he cares & wants to help you. (1st Peter 5: 7)
Let me be transparent real quick: The past few months i have had to remind myself that i cannot please everyone because i found myself wanting to please others more than i wanted to please God. I knew the right thing to do but i felt obligated to do what my so friends were doing. Recently, a situation happened whereby i felt the need to please one of my friends who i've been close with for sometime now. I felt she was ignoring me because she had new friends that she was now concerned about. Instead of taking my emotions to God & seeking him about the issue; i took matters on to my own hands. If i show her that I care about her more than her friends do , then she would give me more attention, right?? I thought. WRONG !!! Then it hit me like a ton of bricks: the reason i was trying to please her was because i was jealous. Say what now ????!!!! Yeah as crazy as it sounds, I felt her new friends were taking my spot & getting all the attention!!! Do you see how nasty our flesh is?? . To be honest that's how i felt, then i realized something: God would never give me friends who would push me away from Him & I SIMPLY WANTED ATTENTION!!. The people God specifically puts in your life will be there to push you closer to Him. These people will encourage, correct & be there to advice you in your relationship with Christ. The reason now i desired attention was because i had put my focus on pleasing my friend instead of pleasing God. The need to please my friend came as a result of me wanting attention & taking my eyes of Christ ! Where is your focus??
Let me make something clear: God wants us to love people & yes really LOVE them despite what they may have done to us. Can you do this with your own strength? Absolutely NOT. You need the Holy spirit to love unconditionally & He will help you if you let him. Yes, God wants you to love people but he does not want them to be your focus or "god" that you go around trying to please & obey. Your focus should be on Christ: Obeying & pleasing Him. So instead of rolling your eyes & feeling the need to get back at the person who showed no concern towards you after doing everything you could for them: Run to Christ & let him heal your broken heart. Let God do a work in you & know that it takes time. It's not something that happens overnight, but you will be tested time after time. Keep your eyes on Christ & lay everything down. If you are jealous, bitter, angry, admit it because God knows & wants to help you. Admitting how you feel is the first step of the healing process.
Lastly, if you are scared of people not liking you or hate the feeling of rejection, know you're not alone & we are all a working process. God can deal with our hearts, showing us how to love others while still having a boundary of not allowing people to be our focus. Remember if you feel the need to please others; seek Christ & let him show you why you feel the need of pleasing whoever you're trying to please. As he revealed to me, it was jealousy that made me feel the need to please my friend. He is faithful & wants to help you. Keep moving forward & rest that God will connect you with the right people who will love you for who you are & who will push you closer to Christ !!
Scriptures to reference:
- "Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ." (Galatians 1:10 NIV)
- " Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters; "(Colossians 3:23 NIV)
- " Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell. "(Matthew 10: 28 NIV )
- "On the contrary, we speak as those approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel.We are not trying to please people but God, who tests our hearts." (1st Thessalonians 2:4 NIV)
Love you all;
Edith.
